Remember yesterday? You should — it seemed like yesterday took freaking forever.
Albert Scipione, who operated the not-at-all-shady day trading firm Traders Cafe in Tampa with Matthew Ionno, cut a federal plea deal and will admit to defrauding investors to the tune of nearly half a million dollars. Ionno pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit wire fraud back in July.
The reign of the first-ever all-female Hillsborough County School Board began, as newly elected members Melissa Snively and Sally Harris were sworn in to join re-elected April Griffin and the rest of the board. Some male lifetime politicians are gonna be in trouble when the women start getting stuff done ...
According to NPR, all 50 states hit 32 degrees or colder yesterday. Various reasons being given for the total freeze include "sin,""climate change" and "it's fucking winter."
A Daytona woman has been accused of killing and dismembering her neighbor, then trying to hide the evidence by cooking the parts. Neighbors were made suspicious by the delicious aromas emanating from her home, despite the fact that she always ordered takeout.
And finally, the U.S. Senate last night narrowly voted down the bill that would have made the controversial Keystone XL pipeline a reality. President Barack Obama, who would've vetoed the bill had it passed, is reportedly unsure whether to be thankful or angry that the Senate saved him the move — he does understand, however, that it's all his fault.