Two-year-old Kaliyah Austin vomited.

Before calling the doctor, LaShonna Delgardo, the toddler’s single mom, made a 7:45 a.m. call to her Dunkin’ Donuts supervisor on November 21.

The response from her supervisor, Delgardo's fourth in a year, wasn't good.

Despite finding a replacement, co-worker Britney Wilkerson, to cover her 3 p.m. shift, Delgardo was informed that her hours would be cut if she did not make the 1 p.m. staff meeting and her shift.

Suffering from asthma and allergies, Kaliyah was exhibiting symptoms of something severe.

Delgardo rushed her to the doctor and then scrambled to make the 1 p.m. employee meeting.

Kaliyah vomited throughout the meeting.

Employed as a Team Leader at Dunkin’ Donuts for 16 months, Delgardo took part in Thursday’s Fast Food Workers Strike! March For 15!

She joined about 75 other protesters outside Kentucky Fried Chicken on East Busch Boulevard in solidarity with 100-plus city protests to raise awareness of the needs of minimum wage workers.

Representing Florida Fast Food Workers for Fair Pay, Delgardo and Wilkerson helped organized the rally.

Earlier in the day, a 6:30 a.m. protest was held at Dunkin’ Donuts on East Busch Boulevard. Approximately 40 people showed up, Delgardo and Wilkerson among them.

As momentum builds nationwide for an increase in the minimum wage, many states and localities have been raising the minimum on their own, up from the federal government’s $7.25 hourly rate set in 2009.

Backed by organized labor, including the Service Employees International Union, the protesters not only spoke up against low wages but also unfair practices and lack of respect.

“We don’t have any rights,” Delgardo said. “We make the money for them and are treated like second-class citizens.”

In her 16 months at Dunkin’ Donuts, Delgardo has never missed a shift, often filling in for associates unable to work.

As Team Leader, Delgardo makes $8.30 an hour, up from $7.99 when hired.

Though Delgardo holds certifications in phlebotomy and as an EKG technician, she has been unable to find work in those fields. With $650 monthly rent and no car, Delgardo walks to work. She receives food stamps, which often fall short.

In Florida, minimum wage stands at $7.79 an hour.

Eighteen states and the District of Columbia join Florida in higher-than-average wages.

California, Connecticut, New York and Rhode Island have passed bills elevating the minimum wage in 2014. New Jersey voters agreed to do the same on their November ballots.

The rhetoric continues on both sides as businesses argue that increasing the minimum wage could increase costs and force many workers out of their jobs.

Workers argue that increased wages translate into additional spending by minimum wage workers.

With economic disparities gaining attention nationally and internationally, workers' demands of $15 an hour incite the ire of those opposed.

Many view the $15-an-hour standard as more of a rallying point than an expectation.

Pastor Russell Meyer of the Florida Council of Churches believes it comes down to common sense.

"One out of three people in our country is food insecure and the reason is because of poverty wages," Meyer said. "My taxes provide food stamps and rent assistance because corporations like KFC won't pay living wages."

Meyer said it takes the average fast-food worker at least two minimum-wage jobs to afford rent on a two-bedroom apartment.

"Many of these corporations' business models make work difficult for employees so they can continue to hire and rehire at minimum wage," Meyer said.

Meyer admits to indulging in fast food as he travels frequently.

"It's not about denying businesses but about making it a win-win situation," Meyers said.

Meyers said he felt compelled to speak out for those who can't or who fear repercussions.

For the most part, Tampa's protests continued peacefully. When lines were crossed, as they were at the McDonald's on East Busch Boulevard, McDonald's management stood back and watched and then politely asked protesters to stay on the sidewalk, out of the way of patron automobile traffic.

Tampa police stood by.

As a couple of protesters challenged the request, Kelly Benjamin, one of the protest's organizers (and an occasional CL contributor), stepped up to mediate and announce the passing of Nelson Mandelsa.

"As we stand here today, with the news of Nelson Mandela's passing, we should reflect on what he fought for, what he stood for," Benjamin said. "He was against inequality, injustice, discrimination, and we should reflect on why we are here standing in front of this multi-billion-dollar corporation that pays poverty wages."

Calming the crowd, Benjamin continued.

"The issues that Nelson Mandela fought for and what we are fighting for, are the same."

In President Obama's economic policy speech Wednesday, he addressed the disparity of pay among fast food and retail workers and the need to raise the federal minimum wage.

"They work their tails off and are still living at or barely above poverty," Obama said.

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev said a wage hike vote will take place before the end of the year.

With Republicans staunchly opposed to it, the measure is not expected to pass in the House.

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During the reign of eBooks, Kindles and Nooks, the livelihood of bound books is being threatened. However, devoted readers maintain an attachment to tangible forms of fiction/non-fiction. Haslam’s Book Store in St. Petersburg is a product of that devotion, and will celebrate their 80th anniversary on Dec. 8 at 2 p.m.

Opened during the Great Depression by John and Mary Haslam, the objective of the store has always been to provide readers with affordable books and magazines. As Florida’s largest new and used bookstore, the space spans over 30,000 square feet and holds over 300,000 books.

Aesthetically, Haslam’s Book Store has undergone very minimal changes over the last 80 years. According to Ray Hinst, a third generation co-owner of Haslam’s, ever since moving locations 50 years ago, there has been only one major expansion.

“We just keep doing what we’re doing,” Hinst said. “People like continuity.”

Hinst believes that although contemporary society relies heavily on technology, bound books have a durability and tangibility that transcends generations.

“This is the media we have used to communicate our history, our morals, our ethics, our philosophy, our lessons, our science and our technology for five centuries. That’s a big deal,” Hinst said. “There’s something about the way the media works. You can carry it with you. You can read it in low light, and it doesn’t run out of batteries.”

Although older demographics have consistently maintained a loyalty to bound books, Hinst credits J.K. Rowling with extending the life of hard-copied novels by making children book lovers in contemporary society. He believes Stephenie Meyer and Suzanne Collins (respectively responsible for the Twilight and Hunger Games series) can thank her for their success.

“The experiences children underwent with [the Harry Potter series] are things they wanted to repeat,” Hinst said. “You cannot fully get that from technology.”

The Haslam’s experience has spanned several generations and caters to nostalgia. Particularly during the holiday season, Haslam’s Book Store becomes a space where grandparents can share a part of their past with their children and grandchildren. Hinst said that he consistently sees customers who sat on the store’s floor and read ten cent comics in their youth bring their grandchildren in to create new memories.

The store itself is runs on a legacy—Hinst’s son works at Haslam’s, marking four generations of family involvement.

At the 80th anniversary celebration, several keynote speakers—including Dr. Ray Arsenault—will share their experiences with the store and the Haslam family. Speakers will discuss the store’s contribution to the community, and the event will feature photographs of guests and the store throughout the last 80 years. The celebration will continue at Craftsman House Gallery & Cafe for complimentary cake beginning at 3:30 p.m.

“We’ve always wanted to provide a place where someone who likes books can come and find something for them—regardless of taste, age and your economic status,” Hinst said. “There is truly something for everybody, and that’s something we’d like to continue for another 80 years.”

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The resourceful folks at Current of Tampa Bay, known for their Best of the Bay-winning Laundry Project, have organized another event aimed at helping low-income families, and this one's right in keeping with the season. The second annual Affordable Christmas offers families invited or referred by several faith-based organizations to shop for children's gifts at one-tenth the retail cost. The discount shopping spree takes place today from 11 a.m. - 2 p.m. at Crossover Church, located at 1235 E. Fowler Ave., Tampa.
Donations can still be dropped off at the church today. Requested items include new or unused bicycles, sports toys and equipment, skateboards, scooters, video games, movies, dolls, action figures, arts and crafts and more. All gifts are intended for children and teens 0-14 years old. To see the full list of items, go to christmasbycurrent.org.
Volunteers are also welcome. For more information, contact Jason Sowell at Jason@engagethecurrent.org or at 727-537-9082.

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As the Rick Kriseman era approaches, his collection of transition teams have been meeting with local organizations and constituents to become better acquainted with the issues and ensure a smooth shift. This continued Friday afternoon, as Kriseman's Transportation Transition Team met with officials from the Tampa Bay Area Regional Transit Authority (TBARTA).

Given that this meeting served more as an introduction than anything else, TBARTA's Executive Director Bob Clifford, dominated the meeting, explaining the organization's goals for the Tampa Bay region, stretching from Citrus County to Sarasota, and how Pinellas fits in. One of Clifford's main points was the need for a transportation plan with a regional vision, as opposed to the usual county wide focus.

“When you're going somewhere, you don't think about political jurisdictional boundaries,” said Clifford. “You just want to get there. We all often cross jurisdictional boundaries, whether they be city boundaries, county boundaries. We think nothing of it, it does not matter to us. But when we address transportation from the planning and implementation perspective, we put it in different silos of those different entities that we all deal with.”

According to Clifford, Tampa Bay is home to seven transit providers, three commercial airports, six metropolitan planning organizations, three regional planning councils, two FDOT districts, and two highway toll authorities.

Clifford has found that this lack of cohesiveness has played a role in Tampa Bay missing out on state and federal transportation grants to it's in-state rivals.

“We were not consistent on what our priorities were. The challenge of that was we would hear it from FDOT, we would hear it from the state legislature, we would hear it from congressional delegates, we would hear it from the administration, from the governors office. They would say to us 'when we hear from Orlando they say the same three or four projects all the time'. South Florida, same thing. Go to Tampa Bay and we hear a whole list of different projects and whoever I talk to gives me a different priority.“

In following the lead of Orlando and South Florida, TBARTA has looked at projects that would benefit the region as a whole. Those include thosein the spine of the area, consisting of the Gateway and Westshore business districts, along with Tampa and St. Petersburg's respective downtowns. One was the need for redevelopment of the northbound span of the Howard Frankland Bridge.

While making it clear that there are no current plans to implement it, Clifford recommended that the new span should be constructed in a way that would accommodate light rail, eventually better connecting the two business districts that when combined, would create the second largest business district in the Southeast. Clifford also made reference to future redevelopment of Tampa International Airport, possibly connecting the airport to a consolidated transportation area in Westshore, that would serve as a hub for tourists and locals.

Other topics included the issue of bringing tourists that visit Tampa for it's cruise lines to Pinellas beaches, the pros and cons of embracing the private sector for transportation developments, and the benefits of using public funds to leverage state and federal funds.

The transportation team's next meeting will be next Tuesday when they meet with the PSTA board and Greenlight Pinellas.

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There's no telling what led you to Sunday's decision to sip on a Bloody Mary. But here you are. And you don't just want some vodka and tomato juice slapped together with a celery stick.

You want a Bloody Mary that gets up early, stays up late, with uninterrupted prosperity, who uses a machete to cut through red tape.

You want the Bloody Ella, the rib-garnished take on the Bloody Mary from Ella's Folk Art Cafe in Seminole Heights. That's right, the glass arrives with owner Ernie Locke's infamous hickory-smoked ribs. Made with chipotle vodka and rimmed with Locke's BBQ-rub, it's a revelation in brunch cocktails.

It's only available on Sundays, as part of the Soul Food Sunday brunch (a formidable weekly culinary event one should experience as often as possible).

$10, 11 a.m.-8 p.m., 5119 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa, 813-234-1000.

And since I liberally quoted Cake's Short Skirt Long Jacket, you can jam on this en route to your Bloody Ella.

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Sunday brought the first of a hyped three-part series in the Tampa Bay Times on Rick Scott's economic record, entitled "Big Promises, Small Gains." The key statistic? The Times reports that "96 percent of the jobs that Scott promised during his 2010 campaign for governor remain unfulfilled."

But but late Sunday morning the Governor's communications team had fired back with an over 1,100-word response refuting numerous charges made in the paper.

Specifically they dispute 12 specific charges made in the lead story of the package, which is led by Times/Miami Herald Tallahassee Bureau Chief Steve Bosquet (In a bit of a slight to the Times, the Scott press release refers to the story as only being written by the Herald. Regarding the charge that the total number of jobs).

Here's the entire press release, after the jump:

SETTING THE RECORD STRAIGHT

Governor Scott’s Strong Record of Economic Growth Detailed, RE: Miami Herald’s Story

“In the four years before Governor Scott took office, hundreds of thousands of jobs had been lost. Since the Governor took office, hundreds of thousands of jobs have been created. Under Governor Scott, companies are choosing to move to Florida from other states, reversing years when Florida was considered uncompetitive for job creation projects. There is no doubt that Governor Scott’s job creation policies are working. But, there is still more work to be done to develop an opportunity economy that creates jobs for generations to come.”— Melissa Sellers, Communications Director, Governor Rick Scott

MYTH: “Of the jobs Scott can influence most, only a fraction now exist.”

FACT: The Miami Herald’s statement ignores the many state economic policies that support economic growth beyond just those companies who compete for state incentive funds. Economic policies including tax cuts, and repealing burdensome regulations contribute to increased business investment and job creation. Florida added more jobs in the month of October than any other state in the country. The state’s addition of more than 440,000 new private sector jobs under Governor Scott stands in sharp contrast to the more than 800,000 jobs lost in the four years before Governor Scott took office. CEO Magazine now ranks Florida #2 in the nation for job creation, up from #6 in 2010, before the Governor took office.

MYTH: “The total number of new jobs Scott ultimately might deliver doesn't offset the jobs lost at companies with more than 100 workers in the same time period.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to acknowledge the creation of 440,000 private sector jobs under Governor Scott, and incorrectly makes an apples-to-apples comparison between job gains through incentive deals with a select group of companies who adjusted their employment for any reason whatsoever over the same time.

MYTH: “The jobs outlook isn’t better in Broward and Miami-Dade counties, where Scott inked deals to create 5,456 jobs in exchange for $25.2 million tax incentives and breaks. Jobs created to date: 61.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that many of these projects have timelines from five to 10 years. Governor Scott has only been in office for about three years, leaving many years for companies to meet their legally binding job creation/capital investment goals.

MYTH: “Two years after Scott agreed to spend $250,000 renovating a Kissimmee warehouse for Colt's Manufacturing Company, the building sits empty.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to include that under Colt’s agreement with the state, the company’s jobs are not due until the end of calendar year 2013.

MYTH: “Nearly a year after Scott hailed news of 350 jobs at a sawmill in struggling Suwannee County, construction is just beginning.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that this company is facing delays at their construction site due to naturally occurring sinkholes.

FACT: Additionally, the jobs for this project are not contractually due to the state until the end of calendar year 2013 and 2014.

MYTH: “For hundreds of other projects, the state website that tracks jobs data, Floridajobs.org, shows the same number of jobs created during Scott's tenure: 0.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that each of the projects listed on the economic development portal have their own timeline for job creation/capital investment. Many company timelines average around five to 10 years, and Governor Scott has only been in office for about three years — leaving many years left for companies to meet their legally binding job creation requirements with the state.

MYTH: “For example, Bi-Lo Holdings, corporate parent of the Winn-Dixie grocery chain, stands to get $3.6 million in incentives to keep its headquarters in Jacksonville and create 100 new jobs over 11 years. That's a $36,000 bonus for every job created, the highest cost per job of any incentive deal during Scott's term, according to the Times and Herald analysis. State officials say the figure is so high because Bi-Lo also agreed to retain 891 existing jobs at an average salary of $81,000 and make $81 million in capital investments. The state and Bi-Lo struck the deal on June 1, 2012, but 18 months later, the state confirms zero Bi-Lo jobs.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that Bi-Lo’s agreement has already retained 891 jobs and the company’s new jobs are not due under their agreement until the end of calendar year 2013.

FACT: The Miami Herald incorrectly reports that the per-job incentive total is “$36,000.” It is, in fact, $3,633.

MYTH: “Evolution promises to hire 40 people over the next two years — salesmen, mechanics, accountants — with an average salary of $40,000. The company is starting small, with a sales center in a small building. The state lists no jobs created yet.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that the jobs under the agreement for this project are not due until the end of calendar year 2013.

MYTH: “Home Source, a maker of furniture, lighting and textile products, plans to employ 303 people at an average wage of $14 an hour in a region desperate for jobs. Scott approved $1.4 million in immediate incentives in May 2012 that paid for improvements to the building, but the jobs are slow in coming: the company says 23 so far.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that the jobs for this project under their agreement are not due until the end of 2013. Additionally, these incentive funds under the agreement go to the local government to reimburse the cost of the facility renovations.

MYTH: “He has offered tax breaks and incentives for a Sam’s Club discount store in St. Petersburg, a Miami-Dade Walmart…”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that the Brownfield incentive focuses on the redevelopment of blighted site and is not dependent on wage requirements like most other incentives.

MYTH: “Navy Federal Credit Union plans 1,500 jobs in Pensacola by the same year.”

FACT: The Miami Herald fails to report that Navy Federal’s 2012 project is more than a year ahead of schedule in their job creation requirements. They have retained 1,944 people, created 140 net new jobs, and also purchased land at more than $3.75 million for a portion of their capital investment requirements.

MYTH: “A $280,000 sales tax refund for DTW covers the moving costs of all 40 employees, Statile said. The incentive was a factor, but so were Florida's lack of a state personal income tax and the island's proximity to the ocean.”

FACT: Pam Statile, President, dtw Marketing Research Group, Inc. said, “A number of factors went into our decision to move to FL, including the business friendliness of the state, the absence of income tax, the weather, the ocean, the labor pool, AND the tax refund incentive. We never intended to move 40 employees and will not, the balance between those who have moved (14 employees) would be new, local hires. We do not look at the incentive as a cost offset to our moving employees, I’m not even sure the maximum incentive will cover the cost of relocation.”

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Derrick Pierce has made a profession out of being bad. The square-jawed fitness expert races motorcycles, is covered in tattoos, owns pit bulls, trains MMA fighters, and is paid to have sex with women on camera.

Before breaking into the adult industry, Pierce coached, trained, and cornered MMA athletes who fought in the WEC and the UFC. In 2008 he muscled his way into porn with a girlfriend who was new to the industry. The next year he won Best Male Performer at the NightMoves Awards, then was named Unsung Male Performer of the Year at the 2010 AVN Awards. Pierce has worked with all the major adult studios, performing in everything from BDSM to feature adult films. Capitalizing on Pierce's bad boy brand, famed adult director, Axel Braun, casted Pierce as the villain in several of his x-rated parodies, including Wolverine XXX, Iron Man XXX, and The Dark Knight XXX. In 2013, Pierce directed his first feature adult film with Wicked Pictures, Tuff Love, which focuses on the world of underground MMA fighting.

Why do you think Axel Braun keeps casting you as the villain in his comic book parodies when many of the heroes in these films are just as physically intimidating, flawed, and sinister as the “bad guys"?

Axel keeps casting me because we have a great working relationship in regards to him being a director and me an "actor." He also knows that he can depend on me to be reliable and deal with the confines of the characters involved. As far as the antagonist vs protagonist... Well, that is always up for debate.

The spheres of MMA and porn often overlap. For instance, Jenna Jameson dated Tito Ortiz. Jesse Jane is dating MMA trainer, Michael Giovanni. The MMA fighter, War Machine moonlights as a male porn performer and is dating the new adult starlet Christy Mack. What do you think is the connection between MMA and porn?

I think that both are potentially "raw" at their roots. They both started outside the scope of the public eye and weren't really participated in for the purpose of fame. Obviously that has changed on both fronts.

Which would you rather watch, a porn or an MMA fight? Why?

MMA fight. Probably because I'm not sure of the outcome of the fight. In porn you always know what's gonna happen and how it's gonna end.

Which has more vigorous blood testing, porn or fight commissions?

Adult for sure. The level of frequency is much higher. Of course, at this time ours is still voluntary (as an industry) and fighters are required to participate in order to obtain and maintain a pro license.

Which do you think is more flawed, mainstream media’s portrayal of porn performers or MMA fighters?

Probably porn performers. I think we are put into a single category from the beginning. Most know that fighters come from all sorts of backgrounds.

Which activity have you had the most medical expenses as a result of: motorcycle racing, MMA training, or porn?

Porn for sure.

MMA gyms are notorious for being unhygienic. Have you ever given ringworm or staph, or one of the many other skin diseases that plague many fight gyms, to a sex partner?

Lol, no I don't believe I have

In your directorial début for Wicked Pictures, Tuff Love, your protagonist, played by Adrianna Luna, delves “into the seedy world of underground female smoker fights.” Why do so many films about MMA revolve around this mythologized realm of underground fighting? Is it a combination of factors: illegal gambling raises the stakes of each fight; these settings allow for more menacing characters; filming a fight scene in a “underground” arena is cheaper than filming an amateur MMA bout in a strip club parking lot?

It's a movie... It just makes things more dramatic and taboo. I doubt there is much more reason outside of that.

You’ve said that you have a fetish for Latina and Asian women. As a Mexican/Pilipino porn performer who has a few Muay Thai fights under her belt, is Adrianna Luna the sexiest woman on Earth to you?

She is definitely one of the most beautiful and strong women that I have even been around. She is an amazing woman.

In the same way Kung Ku once informed all the fight scenes in mainstream films, now many fight scenes incorporate MMA moves. What are some of the major flaws with how Hollywood portrays these scenes: ungloved brawlers never break their hands; when a guy fully mounts his opponent on the street he never gets kicked in the face by the victim’s buddies; if you go for an arm-bar in a parking lot you will likely smash the back of your head against the concrete… ?

I have seen those things portrayed on film before. Maybe you should take in more movies from that genre.

You have marketed yourself as the “Bad Boy of Adult.” Are the signs of a “bad boy” really just indicators of increased testosterone levels: increased muscle mass, broad shoulders, square jaw, increased facial hair, baldness, and thrill seeking behavior such as fighting or motorcycle racing?

No and I don't think that is proven that all of those things can be attributed solely to increased levels of testosterone.

Various psychological studies have demonstrated that women are more attracted to less masculine faces during the majority of their menstrual cycle when they cannot conceive a child. However, they are more attracted to men who have the hallmarks of increased testosterone when they are ovulating. The best theory to explain this discrepancy is that biologically, human females want alpha males to father their children, while they want beta and omega males to raise them. In essence, women want to have affairs with bad boys while settling down with nice guys. Have you noticed this to be a problem in your life, that more women see you as a great potential fuck buddy as opposed to a boyfriend?

I don't agree, at least in my case.

Did being raised by a single mother who always brought around her attractive female friends give you an edge when it came to learning how to charm women at such a young age?

Sure. Practice makes perfect. If you want to understand women, then close your mouth and LISTEN.

Follow Alfie on Twitter or Facebook and email him here

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The big question I had before viewing Alex Gibney's The Armstrong Lie was whether I would really learn anything new about seven-time Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong's epic fall from grace. That's because the narrative of Armstrong's journey from cancer victim to bike race champion to disgraced doper is already familiar to most of us.

Gibney is perhaps the best — and certainly the most prolific — documentary filmmaker in America, with his films on the Enron scandal and Abu Ghraib in particular earning critical acclaim. He delivers the goods again in The Armstrong Lie, creating a film that clearly illustrates the hold Armstrong had on the many people willing to buy his story.

The two-hour documentary (now playing at BayWalk in St. Pete and the AMC Woodlands Square in Oldsmar) begins with footage of Armstrong telling Oprah Winfrey last January that he did in fact use performance enhancing drugs (PED's) during much of his bike racing career, shattering the illusions held by his most-diehard supporters that he hadn't engaged in such nefarious activities.

For those paying attention, the first serious evidence that Armstrong was doping came from a 2004 book L.A. Confidentiel: Les secrets de Lance Armstrong (L.A. Confidential: Lance Armstrong's Secrets) by sports journalist Pierre Ballester and Sunday Times sports correspondent David Walsh. You're probably never heard of it, since Armstrong's legal team successfully blocked the French tome's U.S. publication.

The walls of denial started crumbing sometime after Armstrong's former teammate Frankie Andreu and his wife Betsy testified in a deposition in 2005 that they had heard Lance confess to using PEDS (specifically testosterone, EPO, growth hormone, cortisone and steroids) in 1996 while in a hospital room battling cancer. Armstrong vehemently denied he said any such thing, and began an unrelenting attack on the couple.

At that time Armstrong had just retired after winning an unprecedented seventh Tour de France, the professional cycling world's major championship. He was on top of the world, engaged to a rock star (Sheryl Crow) and considered a humanitarian for the millions of dollars he was raising for cancer research through his Livestrong Foundation.

But it was all predicated on a lie.

Personally, I've always been of a mixed opinion about Armstrong. The fact of the matter is much of the professional sporting world — well, certainly Major League Baseball, at least — was awash in athletes using PED's beginning in the mid-to-late 1990s and throughout the aughts. Certainly not everyone, but many competitive athletes were doping — some were caught, others weren't.

Society and the media have chosen to make examples of some of these athletes more than others. In baseball, for example, it's currently Alex Rodriguez receiving the most ridicule — though it used to be Barry Bonds. But the culture of competitive cycling — and of all professional sports, frankly — makes it understandable (though not necessarily right) that athletes, especially the greatest ones, would go this route.

And as Armstrong (and the rest of us know now), it certainly wasn't just him who was doping. Like Bonds and Roger Clemens, he was simply the best of the best in doping, and his performance soared. But like those other top athletes, Armstrong's M.O. was deny, deny, deny, and trash anyone who dared suggest otherwise just in case. It was the vehemence and outright bullying of his critics that ultimately left Armstrong's reputation in tatters.

Enter Gibney.

In 2009, four years after he initially retired, Armstrong announced he was making a comeback at the Tour de France. Gibney was hired to document this, which pissed off the Andreus and other Lance critics who were disappointed that such a talented filmmaker was buying into Armstrong's propaganda. In on candid on-camera moment, Betsy Andreu even admits she couldn't believe that Gibney would "buy into the bullshit."

But while Gibney was editing his film in 2012, Armstrong's world began to collapse. That fall from grace then shaped The Armstrong Lie, with Gibney admitting to being duped by the charasmatic Texan. He conducts his own interview with Armstrong where the cyclist admits to having lied, and adds in never before seen footage of Armstrong's comeback in 2009.

So to circle back to the beginning: Did I learn anything new about Lance Armstrong? Perhaps not. But the film stands as a solid retelling of the story of a man who came back from stage-three testicular cancer to ascend to the greatest heights of celebrity before being taken out by his own hubris. If that's not a story worth documenting, I'm not sure what it.

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Last week supporters of the Hillsborough County Public Transportation Commission rejoiced after a bill that would have allowed voters to decide on whether or not the troubled agency should be abolished went down to defeat during a meeting of local Hillsborough County area state lawmakers.

The agency's tattered image well before former County Commissioner Kevin White ending up in jail for taking bribes while serving as the agency's chairman or its former executive director, Cesar Padilla, got busted for moonlighting (and ultimately resigned).

But the bill's sponsors - Representative Jamie Grant and state Senator Jeff Brandes - came at the PTC from another angle, saying that the agency rule that mandates that limo and sedan drivers charge at least $50 per ride stifles free enterprise and has deterred alternative transportation services like Uber from getting a toehold in the market.

The $50 minimum is also the source of a lawsuit that a Hillsborough County judge ruled today can continue, rejecting a request by PTC attorneys to throw it out.

However, Hillsborough Circuit Court Judge Charles E. Bergmann did agree to remove Hillsborough Count Commissioner Victor Crist from the suit, as per the request of the attorneys representing the PTC.

"We'd only named him (Crist) out of an abundance of caution because we were concerned that there might be a counterargument that he needed to be included, " said Justin Pearson executive director for the Institute for Justice Florida Chapter, who filed the lawsuit along with three individual plaintiffs in late August.

Pearson contends that the $50 minimum fare rule exists "just to protect certain entrenched interests from competition, which is why he says it's not a surprise that two separate entities - Red Top Cab Company and West Coast Transportation Services, Ltd - have petitioned Judge Bergmann to be allowed to assist the PTC in their defense of that minimum fare rule.

A separate hearing will be held on that issue tomorrow.

"Somethings you just can't make this stuff up, " Pearson said of the new groups requesting to join the defense of the minimum fare. "This just confirms everything we've alleged."

While Hillsborough County is the only county in the state that has a public transportation commission, it is not the only county that has a minimum fare. Miami-Dade has a $70 minimum fare, though there are legislators in that part of the state who are trying to repeal that law.

Next up after tomorrow's hearing the two sides will go into discovery, where they will exchange information and then take depositions. Pearson says a request for summary judgement of the case probably won't take place until next summer. Hillsborough County Attorney Rob Brazel says that timeline could be correct, depending on how many witnesses need to be deposed.

"It shouldn't be against the law to give your customers a better deal," Pearson says in summarizing the thrust of his group's lawsuit against the PTC. He contends the Florida Constitution protects the rights of small business owners to operate free from unreasonable regulation and customers from being in charge.

Hillsborough County Attorney Chip Fletcher disputes that allegation. He tells CL that the commission was established for the purpose of regulating taxis and limousines and "we think that they’ve been acting within the scope of their constitutional statuatory and constitutional authority for decades now." He says that the $50 minimal fare has been part of their regulatory scheme for many years and "we don’t think that there’s any aspect of what their doing in terms of their regulatory scheme that is unconstitutional or illegal as argued by the plaintiffs."

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Nothing like a spritz of show tunes to cure the Monday blahs.

Tonight Beak's on Broadway entertains diners at Grand Central's Old Florida-style eatery. The weekly cabaret is from 8 to 10:30 p.m. every Monday and showcases local musical theater stars belting out popular tunes.

Jason Fortner, who usually emcees, is out of town and won't be hosting tonight. Becca McCoy steps in with Lisa Stanforth and others. The singers keep it clean, so all ages welcome.

Beak's St. Pete features full liquor bar and live entertainment six nights a week. This evening Chef Kate has bacon-wrapped meatloaf with peas, carrots and garlic mashed potatoes.

Admission is free; reservations are recommended. Beak's is at 2451 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-321-9100. facebook.com/BeaksStPete..

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The second week of releases for December. Info and links for the ones you want to know about most below, plus some other ones you may not have heard of (but should know), with audio & video for your listening and viewing pleasure. Click here to check out releases that dropped over the past few months.

7 Days of Funk, 7 Days of Funk (Stones Throw)
The Funkadelic-inspired hip hop project featuring two West Coast artists — Dam-Funk and Snoop Dogg aka Snoopzilla. First official music video “Faden Away,” directed by Henry DeMaio, captures the performance of the pair rocking an underground party in LA.

The Aikiu, Win EP (Atlas Chair/Sony France)

Audion, Audion X (Spectral Sound)
The dark and dirty techno project of Matthew Dear finally gets a retrospective from the past 10 years.

Lee Bannon, Alternate/Endings (Ninja Tune)

Beastmilk, Climax (Magic Bullet)

Bot’Ox, Basement Love EP (I’m A Cliché)

Brendan Benson, You Were Right (Readymade Records)

Childish Gambino, Because the Internet (Glassnote)
Childish Gambino is the hip hop nom de plume of Donald Glover and this is his second studio full-length. Because the Internet features guest appearances by Chance the Rapper, Jhene Aiko and Azealia Banks, with production handled by Gambino and, among others, Thundercat and Ludwig Goransson. Listen to first single "3005" after the jump and find out about the rest of this week's new releases...

Eric Clapton, Give Me Strength: The 1974/1975 Recordings (Universal)
A 2CD box set that encompasses expanded, remastered versions of 461 Ocean Boulevard and There’s One In Every Crowd; the expanded edition also includes the double-disc live album E.C. Was Here and the complete Freddie King Criteria Studios session. Click here to check out Eric Snider's thoughtful look at the release.

Disfiguring the Goddess, Deprive (Decomp)

Guerilla Toss, Gay Disco (NNA Tapes)

Krystal Keith, Whiskey & Lace (Show Dog/Universal Music)

Mastodon, Live at Brixton (Warner Bros.)

Milosh, Jetlag (Deadly)

Peter Morén, Broken Swenglish Vol. 1 EP (INGRID)

John Mellencamp, John Mellencamp 1978, 1982 (Universal Music)

Kate Nash, Have Faith with Kate Nash This Christmas EP (Dine Alone Records)

Robert Pollard, Blazing Gentleman (GBV Inc.)

R. Kelly, Black Panties (RCA)

Running In The Fog, Silver EP (Father/Daughter Records)

SCNTST, Self Therapy (Boysnoize Records)

Zac Brown Band, The Grohl Sessions Vol. 1 EP (Self-Release)

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For Americans the holidays are about indulging in great food, drinks, and company while watching your favorite holiday flicks. The trick to keeping these staples festive is finding new ways to combine these old traditions. Tonight you can get your fill of the St. Pete flavored, holiday spirit by hitting two events just blocks from each other in downtown.

Burgers + Brews:
The Avenue is teaming up with Green Bench Brewing Co. to deliver a unique taste of St. Pete. A 3-course dinner from the craft burger bar will be paired with a sampling of beer brewed in St. Pete.
theavenuedtsp.com. 330 1st Ave. S. 7 PM. $30.

So You Think You Know Holiday Movies?
Before or after dinner, head just three blocks up First Ave. S. to Studio @620, which will host a buffet of classic scenes and songs from holiday films. The interactive show will feature a trivia game and prizes for the most studied scholars of holiday Americana.
studio620.org. 620 First Ave. S. 8PM. $10.

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Time magazine names its Person of the Year on Wednesday. Among the finalists are Syria's Bashar al-Assad, Iran's new president Hassan Rouhan, gay rights activist Edith Windsor, Pope Francis and Ted Cruz.

But is there seriously any doubt that the Person of the Year in terms of making news and an impact on the world is NSA leaker Edward Snowden? As a Honolulu-based employee of Booz Allen Hamilton doing contract work for the NSA, Snowden became disaffected about how the U.S. was using (and in his mind, abusing) surveillance tactics in the need for security. The data he then accessed and distributed through some thumb drives still are having repercussions, nearly half a year after Glenn Greenwald posted his first stories for The Guardian on the NSA.

Just today we learn via the NY Times another revelation from Snowden's document dump: How U.S. and British spies have infiltrated the fantasy worlds of World of Warcraft and Second Life, conducting surveillance and scooping up data in the online games played by millions of people across the world.

The question that was posed this summer when some of his revelations about the NSA were first exposed was: is he a hero or a traitor? Obviously, everyone has an opinion on that. But nobody has had a bigger impact on the world this year. Just look at the reaction of world leaders (and allies) from Brazil and Spain upon learning that the U.S. was spying on them! The reverberations continue, and will continue into 2014.

And look at how the debate has finally opened up in this country about preserving privacy in the information age, and is it even possible? Snowden has helped those few legislators in Congress (like Oregon's Ron Wyden) who have been critical of what they've learned in classified hearings about what we've been doing since 9/11. No, with all due respect to Pope Francis, Snowden is the Man of the Year, undoubtedly.

Though the Hillsborough County PTC survived its possible demise last week, there are still critics gunning for them. Yesterday a Hillsborough Judge ruled that a case brought against the agency regarding its $50 minimum fare for limos can continue to proceed.

And while the family of the late Pinellas Congressman Bill Young continues to play out in the local media, Kathleen Peters is trying to stay above the fray. The Pinellas House member will participate in a fundraising luncheon for her candidacy to succeed Young in Congress tomorrow hosted by six members of the Republican Caucus in the House, including one member who has shown a tendency in the past to shoot from the hip, shall we say.

And there's a new documentary out about Lance Armstrong playing in the Bay area. The Armstrong Lie is the latest Alex Gibney doc, and you can read my review of it here.

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In advance of his shows at the Tampa Improv (Thursday, December 12- Sunday December 15), I got comedian Greg Behrendt on the horn to talk about life, love, laughter and weighing theoretical airplanes without a scale. It's a task that may prove easier than a successful stand-up career spanning 20 years and a slew of best-selling relationship books (He's Just Not That Into You, It's Called a Breakup Because it's Broken).

Kevin Tall: Hello? Is this Greg? This is Kevin from Creative Loafing.
Greg Behrendt: How’s it going, man?

Doing great. So I was wondering, do you get the weekly edition?
Do I get the weekly edition of Creative Loafing?

Yeah, like the L.A. Times?
No… [laughing]

Fuck! I can’t sell shit!
[Laughing] Here’s the thing... You’re hilarious.

I try. I ask funny people serious questions and serious people funny questions, I dunno. Ask Dominic Monaghan.
I love it.

I feel sorry for anyone reading this not familiar with your material, not only because they’re missing out on a lot of laughs, but this interview is going to read like a bunch of inside jokes. But ya know what, fuck them if they don’t like chicken fingers.
I mean, fuck them if they don’t like chicken fingers! Here’s the thing, what we’re doing is we’re laying down the breadcrumbs for them to make their way back to real comedy.

Exactly.
Right? We’re building a house of comedy, and we’ve laid down the breadcrumbs.

And in building that house of comedy, you better make me a porch, bitch!
I mean, come on, “make me a porch, bitch,” you’ve got it. Buddy, that’s some classic shit. Some of that shit isn’t even that good.

Well, I’ll argue with that one.
Thank you.

It’s been a full decade since Jack Berger delivered the immortal line ‘He's just not that into you’ on Sex and the City. You’re listed as a ‘script consultant’ on the show. Talk to me about how that came to be and what came of it.
We can use language, right?

Absolutely.
Well, the staff was seven women and two gay men, and Michael Patrick King—who was the executive producer and a friend of mine—said, ‘Would you like to come work on the show?’ and I said, ‘Doing what?’ Well he goes, ‘Well, there’s a staff of seven women and two gay men and we need someone to come over and tell us what pussy tastes like.’ So, I mean, how do you… What do you even say to that? I didn’t even think he was serious. You don’t hear that kind of language in a job offer that often.

Yeah, in my last job interview, it was “How would you weigh an airplane without a scale?” I didn’t get that question.
Here’s the thing, I just wouldn’t… If that’s part of the job, forget it. Right?

Right…
Yeah. And they must have to weigh ‘em, right?

Oh! I thought we were talking about that other thing. The answer to that question is water displacement. Since water has a corresponding mass per volume, however much water is displaced by the plane, you can then tell how much it weighs.
Are you telling me that somewhere there’s an enormous swimming pool that they drop airplanes into to see how much they weigh?

I’m hoping it’s theoretical, like a gauge for someone’s problem solving abilities, but shit, I don’t know.
Oh, theoretical water displacement. Interesting. Um, ok, we’ve gone really far away.

The first of many forays, no doubt.
So then I got a job on the show, and my job was to say ‘That guy shouldn’t have a purse.’ And I worked there for the end of the run and I had a now-famous conversation with a girl standing in the hallway about she was seeing a guy who didn’t want to have sex with her. And she asked me what I thought, and the only reason that I said that I think that’s bad is because I wanted to get back to the cookie I was eating. And she fought me on it and at some point I said, ‘You know, he’s just not that into you.’ I don’t remember saying it, I would be lying if [I said] I did. But the girl standing next to me remembered, her name was Liz and she became the co-author of the book. It was her idea to write a book and my wife’s idea to follow through. And there you have it, we wrote a book, when it just could have been a warning label.

So the book, He’s Just Not That Into You, led to The Greg Behrendt Show, if I’m following the timeline correctly.
Yeah, pretty much. There was a second book called It’s Called A Breakup Because It’s Broken and I had resisted the talk show thing for a while, for about a year and a half. But, because my profile had changed so dramatically, I was having a really hard time finding comedy work or anyone to take me seriously as a comic, or anyone to take me seriously on a comedic level, including Comedy Central and those places. So, not that I didn’t have a choice, of course I had a choice, but I didn’t have that many offers to do anything in the TV area except for to do a daytime talk show. And so I thought, you know… I think, I read this the other day it was a quote by Justin Theroux, who wrote Tropic Thunder and Iron Man 2 and is an actor and all that stuff.

And more famously is with Jennifer Aniston.
And more famously, yeah, yeah more famously. And he said, ‘If you have to sell it back to yourself, it’s not a good idea.’ Or if he said, ‘If this seems like a smart career move, it’s not something you’re doing passionately.’ I thought it was both of those things and I gave it a shot and it was what it was.

It was like the Mr. Rogers version of you... and I know you can rock a sweater and Black Rattle lets me know you can do kids programming. So, it was what it was.
It was what it was. I think it was a misguided but earnest attempt to make something different in a genre that doesn’t want or need something to be different.

You didn’t have enough people throwing chairs and shit.
There was already enough of that. We were trying to go for earnest. We were trying to go for sympathetic. We were trying to raise the bar and not give into the racial stereotypes. And nobody cared. The interesting thing is we had numbers that were good enough, the next years those numbers were fine. Like, the paradigm had changed, because of the way the world had changed. And so the fact that we got almost a million viewers every day, that, at that time, was terrible. Oprah was getting six. Then it turned out the next year, oh yeah, 0.8’s good. But it doesn’t matter anyway, I wasn’t up for another year.

So then there’s the cinematic adaptation of He’s Just not That Into You, in which you make a cameo as a church official with the biggest shit-eating grin ever. It looked like you just went buffet style on all the bridesmaids. What did you think of the final cut of the film?
I thought it was fine. You know, I didn’t have anything invested in it, other than it was based on the book that Liz and I wrote. Like I have said in the past, I didn’t really care if they made a western. They made a movie out of it and they paid us handsomely for the rights. There’s no way to pull off something like that with a book that is so dear to everybody and not have some people like it and some people not. But I think they did a very good job. Given what it was, they made a decent movie. It’s not an embarrassment and it’s not a work of art.

So, we know about ringing the doorbell first and ‘fuck you’ sized candy bars for Halloween. Do you have any insight on the holidays even later in the year? Talk to me about Kwanzaa, Greg.
I don’t have any Kwanzaa observations, but I have been saying about Thanksgiving, to me, the event eating thing… I like to leave the Thanksgiving table like a lot of people leave the gym. Sore and dizzy and shaking. If I don’t feel like I’ve been turkey-fucked in a gingerbread prison then I haven’t really experienced Thanksgiving.

So, have you made any birds lately?
I have been making birds almost every show because I’ve been retelling… I was doing that bit in New York when I had a nervous breakdown. So I tell the bit in a story about the bit, which is kind fun.

It’s very meta.
I’m using 8-yeard-old stuff by reclaiming it and putting it back in perspective. So that way, if Criss Angel’s time has passed, it’s really more about magic than anything else.

Well, he actually does have another show coming up, from what I’m seeing on commercials. Rehash your beef with this guy, for readers unfamiliar, keeping in mind we can’t see your hands.
I always say that I love magic but I hate magicians. I like being fooled. If you wave your hands in front of my face and I think you’re doing a trick, I’m easily impressed. If you pull a quarter out of my ear, I’m quite certain you’re a wizard. But I don’t like the way most magicians don’t act like they’re magical; they act like show business dicks. With David Blaine and Criss Angel, it’s like a come-on, they’re using it to get women or to be cool. Magic isn’t cool. It’s magic. And I can’t do it, because I can’t scream, but then I’d do my imitation of what it’d be like, how you would feel if you could actually make birds. What that would feel like every time you made a bird.

With the Criss Angel joke, you get the audience to help you remember his name. Is he really that forgettable or does it just lend itself to your conversational, story-telling delivery?
Now I don’t. At the beginning, I couldn’t remember his name. I kept wanting to call him… I can’t remember what it is I called him. I had some other name for him. You know how you have those weird mix-ups. You know how there’s that steakhouse, Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse? I keep wanting to call it Chris Ruth. I have no idea why. So I would just start to say ‘What’s-his-name’ as I remembered I thought his name was ‘The Mind Eraser.’ I have very vague notions of things I’m actually familiar with. That’s why I have a new two-minute podcast called ‘Vague Stories with Greg Behrendt,’ which is sort of like a spin-off from my regular podcast, ‘Walking the Room.’

I saw you live in Tampa about 6 years ago at the Improv. I asked about your tattoos. And since I’m sure I’m the only dude to ever do so, you now know exactly who I am, right?
Yeah.

Yeah, I’m that guy. And you’re that guy from that thing. So do you guys really build those houses in a week? [Note: Greg looks like Ty Pennington]
You know, it takes us a little while longer to finish the inside, but we don’t tell people that. Also, a lot of times people don’t like the houses after we’ve built them. They act like they do but they don’t. And then they try and sue the network. ‘Cause people are essentially bad.

Fair enough. Not really the thought I’ve ever gotten from Greg Behrendt, but you heard it here first, world. People are essentially bad.
Yeah.

I was asking about your tattoo that reads ‘Faith without works is death.’ Talk to me about that one.
That’s just a reminder, you know, to try and walk the walk instead of talk the talk. It’s sort of one of the big modern problems with religion. I don’t have any problem with you living like a Christian or a Jew or whatever religion it is that you are. But if you’re preaching it and not living, then it doesn’t make sense. I think it’s just sort of an across-the-board thing with how you carry yourself through the world. And it has to do with my sobriety and everything else.

Did you ever get the ‘Devil filing his taxes’ tattoo?
No, or what was it, like a [gargoyle] making a salad?

Yeah.
No, I think I’m done. The last two tattoos I got were drawings that my daughters made of both of us. When True was 3, she drew a picture of me. When Mighty was 3, she drew a picture of Amiira, and those are both tattooed on my forearms. And I think I’m pretty much done. I don’t know that there need to be any more work done. I have a tattoo between my shoulder blades I may have worked on, just so that it looks a little bit better.

And fuck… you’re 50, bro…
I’m 50, bro.

And don’t miss my point. You’re 50 and you’re probably more awesome on a Sunday than my 30-year-old self is an entire year, so don’t worry about that.
Well I don’t know about that. You know, I’ve been saying lately, when you’re 50, your hands hurt from standing. So it’s a weird time. But also, you’re also so vulnerable and closer to the other end of the deal. You have a little bit more gratitude, a little bit more perspective. You realize a lot of things don’t really matter that you thought were super important. Things that you were so worried about or upset about are really kinda dumb.

Like burritos in the baby crib, right?
Yeah, like leaving a burrito in the crib. That’s gonna happen. Like being a parent and worrying about all that stuff when really, you’re gonna make mistakes and really that’s not what parenting is about. It’s about being around, spending a lot of time.

So, after I’ve bombarded you with all of your own material, getting back to your live show, Louis C.K. said he flips his entire routine every year. How often do you turn over material?
Not every year. Here’s what I do: I work up the hour that I really, really like and then I try and perform it into a recording device. And then I start over again, but I do it slowly. And as I do it, when someone comes out to see me, as I’m building that, I’m also playing hits from my 23 years of standup I’ve been doing. Halloween, I’ll throw in the Halloween bit. I’m doing this hour, but right in the middle of it I did a Criss Angel bit because I haven’t quite figured out how this part’s gonna end. Sometimes I have a bit and get rid of it. But I work pretty hard to turn it over. I had a friend come and see me just recently in Tempe who’s an old friend that’s seen my act a lot. And he was like, ‘Man, that’s all new, every word of that!’ And that feels good, ya know. I care about it. I care about the craft, I feel like it’s important to be able to keep excited. Because it would drive me crazy if I didn’t have anything new to say.

When you turn over material, is it kinda compulsory in an internal way or does it depend on the gag and your feeling for it?
Yeah, every single bit of mine is experiential. So things have to happen or I have to be in an observant mood to be able to find things to talk about. I went through a period where my life just wasn’t that interesting, I wasn’t living an interesting life and I was sorta depressed and I couldn’t figure out what to write about. But I don’t love That Guy from That Thing. I like it, but I wish it was better. There are some parts of it that are just like, ‘Man, that stuff was just written. Blah blah blah, that’s the way I’ll work it.’ But I do it because I want to keep it interesting for me. Todd Barry’s like, ‘cause he has such a real, alternative fan base, and they’re always going, ‘Yeah, we’ve heard this one, Todd,’ and he’s like, ‘Yeah, ‘cause I wrote it. It’s my joke, I wanna tell it. I wrote these jokes, I wanna tell ‘em.’ And I understand that. Sometimes you wanna tell one of your old stories because you love it. Every once in a while, I’ll throw in the old chain wallet joke ‘cause I love it. And every once in a while it fucking crushes, but I would hate if I hadn’t moved on from there.

Switching gears, I wonder how your sobriety affects your interaction with fans after a gig. Typically, in our culture, you buy a drink for a guy after a show to show your appreciation. How do you approach that situation?
It all depends. I have social anxiety, a little bit. There are moments where I just don’t wanna go out and talk to anybody. I used to sell stuff, and, also, when the book was really hot, I felt like those women had come out not even to see standup but to get their books signed. So I did a lot of pressing the flesh those days. But then I started to have a nervous breakdown about it because I felt controlled by the book, which is my own little bit of madness. My sobriety makes it so I sometimes just can’t… don’t have the… Ya know, if I had a couple of beers maybe I’d be like, ‘Ah, fuck it, let’s go out and talk to people.’ Also, when I have a couple of beers, I’m like, ‘Let’s go out and break something,’ or ‘fuck somebody.’ That’s why I don’t have them anymore. So I’m just left with my raw feelings and sometimes after a show I go out [and mingle] and sometimes I don’t. That doesn’t mean I don’t love everybody though. I really do appreciate people and I try to let them know that on-stage. But I had to get to the point where I know some people came out and want to do the handshake but I just can’t do it tonight.

So, three comedy albums, three relationship books, The Greg Behrendt Show, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition and your band, The Reigning Monarchs. What’s next for Greg Behrendt?
Well, oddly enough, we’re gonna take a trip back to Oprah in a couple weeks. She does this thing called ‘Lifeclass’ and the producers really flipped out over It’s Just A Fuckin’ Date, so the cool thing is I’m going with my wife. Amiira is the co-author and we’re going out as partners, as opposed to me being the sole face of the book. And it’ll be fun, it’s a little bit more casual than her other show and obviously it’s on her own network… it’ll be fun. And the Monarchs… we wanna get a tour. The record came out, we have a record release party this weekend. We’re gonna be on this thing called ‘Comedy Gives Back,’ which is on YouTube. And it’s the 6th and it’s a 24-hour comedy show around the world and the Monarchs are the house band for the first 12 hours, plus we’re gonna play full versions of a couple of songs. So whatever I can do. I’ve said I’d like to write books, I’d like to play music, I’d like to do standup; is anyone interested? And then I just go.

Merchandise-wise, when are we going to see the Greg Behrendt toaster cozy?
I don’t know that the toaster cozy is ever going to see the light of day, but I do love merchandise. I have a company called Estoy Merchandise and we make my merchandise and the merchandise for the band and the podcast. Which I also love my podcast quite a bit, ‘Walking the Room.’ You’re probably more likely just to see some t-shirts, maybe a bowtie.

Bowtie? Bowties are cool.
Yeah, the Reigning Monarchs sell a bowtie, although I think we sold out of them already. But we sell a black and white checkerboard bowtie.

Thanks a lot for your time and I look forward to seeing you.
Good talking to you, bro. Take care.

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Louis Miller, the former embattled head of Tampa International Airport who resigned in 2010 and took over at Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport just months later, announced on Monday that he will resign at the end of this year after just three years on the job.

From 1996 to the spring of 2010, Miller served as executive director and CEO of the Tampa International Airport, until he resigned under pressure after a confluence of negative stories began dogging him in the local media. But he rebounded quickly, getting hired as aviation general manager of Hartsfield-Jackson in September 2010, though at a lower salary ($221,000 salary in Atlanta vs. $253,000 in Tampa).

The Atlanta Journal Constitution reports that Miller's most notable achievement in his three years in Atlanta was overseeing the opening of the airport's international terminal. However the paper notes that though when Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed hired Miller he emphasized interest in growing air cargo at Hartsfield-Jackson, something that has not materialized there yet.

During Miller's 14-year reign in Tampa, the airport's reputation blossomed into one of the finest in the nation, according to passenger surveys. But there were several issues that dogged himin 2009-2010 that led to his ultimate demise, such as the proposed razing of a $4 million building owned by the airport that had previously been used as a reservation center by Continental Airlines. The decision to do so was made unilaterally by Miller, who had only consulted with Authority member Al Austin, who owns property in the Westshore District. That led the Aviation Authority's to bring in an outside attorney to determine whether Miller and others may have violated laws regarding the way that zoning variances and building demolition decisions were made his time there.

There were also notable tension between Miller and then new board member Steve Burton, who pressed Miller to support investigating ways to bring more direct international flights to TIA,something that Miller had been resistant to, saying simply there wasn't sufficient demand in the marketplace.

After he resigned, the Hillsborough County Aviation Authority made it clear that Miller's successor would have a mandate to bring in more international flights. So far TIA's Joe Lopano has done that, bringing in Edelweiss for direct flights to Zurich, Switzerland and Copa Airlines to Panama City, Panama.

Less than two months ago Miller denied reports that he was contemplating retirement. Though Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed said at the time that he was happy with Miller, the Atlanta news blog The Saporta Report reported that "several City Hall observers have speculated that there likely will be a leadership change at the airport by the end of the mayor’s first term, which ends in January."

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While immigration reform didn't become the defining topic of 2013 as some expected following last year's presidential election, the upcoming mid-term elections will likely bring the issue back to the forefront in 2014. In anticipation, a collection of Latino organizations have released a report card for Congress, grading the efforts of its members in pushing for reform.

Overall the Senate received a passing grade due to its passing of the Border Security, Economic Opportunity, and Immigration Modernization Act of 2013 this past April, with both Marco Rubio and Bill Nelson receiving a favorable “thumbs up” grade. The House of Representatives was given an “Incomplete” due to the it's inaction on the issue, with the only vote taken on the topic being an effort to repeal the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program. Kathy Castor received a “thumbs up”, the only Representative from the Tampa Bay area to receive one.

“We know the votes exist in the House to get this done, and the time for obstruction is over, said Hector Sanchez of the Labor Council for Latin American Advancement, one of the organizations involved, said of Congress in a press conference coinciding with the report's release.

“There is no way to avoid this issue because labor, faith and community groups are united, and we and our allies across the political spectrum are bringing the voice and action of our communities and constituents to the doorstep of Congress. Nobody is off the hook and even with a bill passed in the Senate, nobody is unfurling a ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner for any party or politician. The damage caused by our broken immigration system is too high, every single day, to keep wasting time on the road to reform.”

The collection of organizations, which include Hispanic Federation, Labor Council for Latin American Advancement, League of United Latin American Citizens, Mi Familia Vota Education Fund, NALEO Educational Fund, National Council of La Raza, Voto Latino, plan to continue grading all upcoming congressional votes related to immigration and relay the information to the Latino community.

“We have rallied, marched and pressed members of Congress for reform,” said Ben Monterroso of Mi Familia Vota Education Fund. “We will grow even stronger next year, and if members do not want F’s on their report cards that we deliver to the community, they need to deliver quickly and responsibly on comprehensive immigration reform”

The report is available here.

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Although most Republicans are conceding that the problems with HealthCare.gov are receding months after its abysmal launch, there still remain daunting challenges for those charged with getting as many Americans as possible signed onto the Affordable Care Act before the Dec. 23 deadline — just 13 days away — to get insurance coverage for 2014.

Today in Pinellas Park a group of local citizens who have a strong interest in making it as easy as possible for people to sign up for the ACA gathered for a roundtable discussion with Sol Ross, Director of Business Outreach for the Department of Health and Human Services in Washington. Many of those in attendance were volunteers working for either Enroll America, the group leading efforts to enroll Americans in ObamaCare, or with Organizing for Action, the grassroots organization advocating in support of President Obama's agenda.

Shortly after Ross's sunny proclamation that things on the website "Get better everyday," he was brought down a notch after Carmen Schumacher with Organizing for Action told the group that people going on the site still don't know how to use it, or they get so frustrated in trying to navigate it they end up trashing it publicly, which is what she was subjected to from a local pizza joint owner on Monday night.

"She said she had been on there for two hours, and it really bothered her," Schumacher told the group.

Alex Ramirez with Enroll America said her biggest issue was with educating the public. "A lot of them have so many questions that I can't answer unfortunately."

Ross said that there would be more navigators coming online soon. Those are the the counselors trained to help the uninsured. He also said there was a cultural problem because many people in underserved communities have no history of signing up for healthcare, and thus were more resistant to signing up for a plan. He said that the Department of Education is working on informing school children about the plan and having them talk to their parents about it. He added that the insurance companies would soon start hitting the television airwaves as well to support enrollment.

Shannon Almadrones is a field organizer for Enroll America in Pinellas County. She said her biggest problem was trying to drive uninsured people who had such a horrific initial experience with HealthCare.gov to go back to the website.

Ross said that was a particular vexing challenge, saying if a consumer looking to buy toys for someone for Christmas has an issue with a website they can quickly go onto another site to find the same product. But that obviously isn't the case with HealthCare.gov, the only game in town when it comes to signing up for the government run health exchanges.

Ross said he was also open to hearing suggestions from those out in the field on how the feds could make the signup easier.

Larry Floriani, with the group Doctors For America, complained that there have been so many changes to the law that it's been hard to keep up when trying to inform the public about the plan. He said there was confusion in the business community about the law, and asked Ross directly what parts of it were in effect currently.

Mary White with Organizing for Action said her dilemma is that the people who show up for informational sessions are often over 60 and thus not the key demographic that organizers want to enroll (those would be citizens between 18 and 35, the so-called "young invincibles.")

Ross and many of the participants bemoaned the fact that Florida did not accept the federal government's plan to expand Medicaid in the state, shutting out hundreds of thousands of potential ACA consumers. Although they talked about how the business community is still trying to challenge the Legislature into accepting the money, the fact of the matter is House Speaker Will Weatherford recently said that he still has no intention of doing so.

The Wesley Chapel based legislator wrote sarcastically in an op-ed that "We didn't fall for the Washington promise that, 'If you like your Medicaid funding, you can keep your Medicaid funding.'"

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The pogo-inducing, fist-pumpin’ pop-punk band from “pre-Portlandia-Portland, Ore.,” formed in 2002 and are on their sixth LP — their debut for Saddle Creek. John Agnello (Dinosaur Jr., Sonic Youth) produced the visceral Desperate Ground, and critics have been praising the album as their best since The Body, The Blood, The Machine (Sub Pop). CL caught up with frontman Hutch Harris about his organic distortions, the album’s recurrent themes of violence and his enduring friendship and collaboration with fro-licious bassist Kathy Foster.

CL: You guys toured pretty extensively early this year. What have you been up to during your break?

Harris: Just kind of hanging out at home and just relaxing. We toured so much this year so haven’t been doing too much for the past couple of weeks. … I’ve seen a lot of good shows … Thee Oh Sees and Summer Cannibals.

Critics are praising the new album as a return to form.

We recorded with John Agnello. He was awesome. We’ve always wanted to record with him. One of the things I did on this record that makes it sound like the old ones is I sang through this old cheap vocal mic that I have, that I used on the first record when we were recording on a four track. And I wanted that sound so I actually just brought my four-track with us. I just plugged the mic in and sang through the four track so it sounded all distorted and gritty. He just took that sound and put it on tape. He was just really accommodating with doing exactly what we wanted to do and getting that lo-fi sound but have it produced in a studio.

How long is the next leg of your touring schedule?

It’s only Florida actually. We didn’t get to do Florida on the long trip we that we did in May and June. It’s Gainesville, Tallahassee, Orlando, Jacksonville, Tampa, Palm Beach and Miami. Florida is great to do but it takes so long to do, and if you’re on a long tour already, it takes an extra week. So many people wrote to us who were disappointed we didn’t come to Florida, so we booked an extra trip just for Florida.

What inspired you to take on such brutal themes for Desperate Ground?

We live in such a violent country. People are killing people here and in different countries. We wanted to put out a record to reflect that it because it never seems to go away.

The videos are pretty grisly too.

Oh, yeah, those were a great time. We always have fun making videos. We wanted to be in control of what the videos were. We wrote the treatments ourselves. We got a friend of ours who’s good at film to shoot them, but we directed the videos. They were the first videos we wrote and directed. We’re super happy with how those turned out. … We always want to have more and more control. I’ve kept a lot of control over a lot of aspects of making records. I’ve always kept a lot of control over what we do.

What’s kept you and bassist Kathy Foster going so long?

We’ve known each other for so long and we’ve been good friends for so long. We’ve played music together for so long. It’s the odds that you can really connect with musically and in life because, it’s, like, disarray. You’re not going to find a ton of people that you’re going to get along with and play well with, so when you find people like that, you really stick with them, you know. We found that with [drummer] Westin [Glass] too, but obviously Kathy and I have been playing together for, like, 15 years. We’ll always play together.

How do you complement each other?

I would say that I’m crazy and she’s not crazy. So there’s that!

Is it true that Ben Gibbard of Death Cab helped you get signed to SubPop?

We gave Ben (Gibbard) a copy of the first demos I was working on for the Thermals. He liked them so much, he gave them to SubPop, and then they signed us soon after that. Ben ended up getting some success. Chris Walla worked on our first couple of records, and Death Cab took us on tour with them. They really helped us out a lot. … Sleater-Kinney took us tour a couple times. They were good to us when they were still around, and we were big fans of theirs. I’m still good friends with Quasi, and I got to see their 20th reunion concert a couple of nights ago.

I’m a little older than you, but you can probably relate to me in how surreal those milestones are.

Yeah, I’m old.

What have you listened to for the first time since your younger days?

After I saw Quasi, I put on Field Studies, my favorite record from them. I just listened to it twice in a row. It totally took me back to when I first moved to Portland and I was working in a record store, and I always listened that record.

Anything else you’d like to mention?

Yeah, just that we’re really pumped to play Florida. I’m really glad to play there again.

The Thermals play Crowbar tonight with Beach Day and Florida Night Heat, $15, 1812 N. 17th St., Tampa. Doors at 8 p.m. After party features DJs Mes and Silence with special guest Oprah Spinfrey, aka Theo Severson, and food provided by Cafe Hey, shot and beer specials. (No cover for party.)

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From the modest parking lot and unassuming façade on Central Avenue, you’d never know that Alésia’s charming courtyard exists. But as you pass through the sleek interior dining room and exit out the back door, you’re transported to another world.

To your left, an enormous, colorful bougainvillea tree climbs up a trellis and curves over the patio like a large comforting hand. Two-tops and four-tops are scattered about on either side of a large family-sized table that bisects the space — in direct line with the door to the kitchen that occupies its own building and serves as the space’s back wall.

It’s beautifully lit, and the captivating atmosphere builds anticipation for the delightful food to come. It’s part Saigon and part Paris. The cuisine is not the hybrid from 150 years of French colonization, but rather a bifurcated menu where East and West coexist.

Perhaps the Asian allure of airy, shrimp-flavored chips strikes your fancy. They’re light and crisp, and the fresh seasonal house-made dipping salsa only adds to their appeal. Maybe you’re feeling in the mood for a bowl of European comfort food in the guise of traditional French onion soup with bacon, topped with a baguette crouton and melted gruyère cheese. It’s lush and tasty — better than most versions I’ve had lately. But it still lacks the deep caramelization Julia Child taught us to love.

The soup du jour offers a variety of regional seasonally prepared soups; we sample a bisque of lovely butternut squash with a luxurious mouth feel that bursts with flavor. The vegetarian summer rolls are also a hit at our table; I've brought a larger group than I usually do because the prices are so reasonable. They chow down on the rice paper wrappers filled with fresh mushrooms, mint and vermicelli served with thick hoisin peanut sauce. There are smiles all around. I can’t convince my companions to try the traditionally French charcuterie or cheese platters, so we just move on to entrées.

Ratatouille niçoise is delicious, but more like soup then the traditional roasted vegetable stew that I’m used to from my Provençal travels. It’s got all the usual veggie suspects, but they’re swimming in a garlicky tomato broth. I decide to dump the mound of accompanying fluffy couscous in my bowl and stir things up. It’s odd, but yummy.

Baby bok choy is a great vegetarian option. It’s lightly sautéed with garlic, onions, earthy mushrooms, and sweet carrots, then topped with a bright hit of cilantro. If you wish to add protein, you can choose from either shrimp or tofu — but it’s really tasty as is.

Pho, that staple of Vietnamese cuisine in the USA, has oodles of rice noodles in a layered broth that hits the spot. With fresh herbs and choice of meat — traditional (lean beef & brisket), pho tái (lean beef,) or pho gà (chicken) — it’s a meal in itself. Native English speakers see “pho” and want to say “foe.” But in Vietnamese, which is a tonal language difficult for most Americans, the correct way is more like “fuh.” I’m trying to learn authentic pronunciations for non-English dishes, and encourage you to do the same; it’s the least we can do as we appropriate dishes from global gastronomy.

Alésia’s meat choices prove to be scrumptious as well. Both the soy-marinated Chinese beef short ribs and the grilled pork sirloin back ribs with a spicy-sweet ginger glaze are fall-off-the-bone tender. They’re served with your choice of crisp house greens, roasted vegetables or, my favorite, a creamy individual potato au gratin portion that is outstanding. I enjoy these both so much that I can’t wait to return to try the oven-roasted Cornish game hen — something you don’t see on menus every day.

Despite minimal consumption of alcohol, my table is getting rowdy. I blame this on an extroverted out-of-town guest whom all the locals are excited to see. Time to use dessert as a diversion. I have trouble selling the table traditional Vietnamese “chè bap” tapioca corn pudding or French crepes — even with the promise of Nutella filling.

We settle on chocolate mousse, which is disappointing and tastes of cocoa instead of chocolate. The warm bread pudding fares better, especially with the vanilla bean ice cream. But the star, which transcends the same ice cream that also accompanies it, is the quartet of banana spring rolls. Each sweet ripe warm banana slice is wrapped in a flat crispy triangular shell drizzled with honey and sesame seeds. The combination of flavors and textures brings the elusive element of surprise that I always hope for.

The wine list isn’t large, but it is exceptionally well-chosen, diverse and fairly priced. Alésia offers both a Riesling and a Chenin Blanc by the glass, both white varietals that deserve more attention. Dr. Loosen from Mosel in Germany makes some of the best affordable Riesling on the market, and the Chenin Blanc from Vouvray, France shares the Riesling’s bracing acidity that makes your palate want to take another bite of food.

And at Alésia, that’s a very good thing indeed.

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The intoxicating and crisp perfume of freshly juiced vegetables greets you first. It’s 11 a.m. inside Squeeze Juice Works, St. Pete’s first cold-press juicery, and people are literally lining up for juice.

In the back, juices are pressed, filtered, measured and poured. The bottles are then capped and ready to be loaded into the glass-doored cooler. But barely a bottle makes it from the counter to the cooler before someone scoops it up. The shop stays this busy for more than an hour. It’s as if a juice version of Krispy Kreme’s “Hot Now” neon sign were outside beckoning to passersby.

Squeeze Juice Works had its genesis two years ago when founder Kelly Lessem was navigating the onset of an auto-immune disease known as myasthenia gravis (she began feeling the effects around 2008). As a yoga instructor and massage therapist, Lessem had tried myriad juice cleanses but hadn’t found the one that was just right.

Then she discovered the cold-pressed juicing method, a process that preserves as much nutritional value as possible by never heating the ingredients. A masticating device grinds up fruits and veggies, which are then funneled into what Lessem describes as an “old-timey horse-feed bag” and squeezed under two tons of press until all the juice is pressed out.

“It breaks open the cellulose fibrous wall and releases the nucleus of the plant’s essence,” Lessem says. “Cold-pressed maintains the integrity of the plant. When heat hits food, it’s like an apple being cut and turning brown. The fruit begins to wane and begins the process of dying.”

It’s all about getting the juice while keeping as many live enzymes, vitamins and minerals alive, which is kind of the entire point of drinking juice in the first place.

“I have a friend in Seattle with a company similar to Squeeze that opened six to seven months before I started,” Lessem explains. She’d learned that raw foods could help keep her condition dormant, and went out to Seattle’s Strawberry Moon to train.

“Strawberry Moon is the gold standard for cold-pressed juice,” she says. “When I went, I didn’t even really like juice, but then I tasted cold-press and thought this is something I can play with.”

Back at home in St. Petersburg, she implemented the cold-pressed juice lifestyle using a cherry red Norwalk juicer named Betsy (after the daughter of the American Revolution).

“I started doing serious juicing,” she says. She researched what kind of healing benefits were provided by different kinds of plants and incorporated that knowledge when creating recipes. “Now my body craves it. You can train your palate in just 30 days.”

Soon after Lessem began juicing for herself, others in the community wanted a taste. By April of last year, she’d started selling juice to members of her food co-op, dubbed the “Hot Mommas of St. Petersburg.” By the time this writer found her way to Squeeze Juice Works (Lessem’s main squeeze, Todd Bates, is Creative Loafing’s creative director), people were dropping by her home morning, noon, and night, grabbing up mason jars like ring-eyed juice junkies desperate for a live-enzyme fix. And with just one sip, you can kind of see why. With combinations like apple, spinach, kale, celery, cucumber, ginger, parsley, lemon and a pinch of salt (Daily Mean Greens), drinking a Squeeze juice is that rare occasion when something good for you actually tastes good.

“When people start giving the body concentrated nutrition, your organs wake up and guide you toward healing,” Lessum says. “Ninety-nine percent of illnesses are triggered by stress; it’s all about getting the mind into balance with the body. The most effective kind of healing is the kind without any suffering.”

Soon the operation moved into a commercial kitchen. Business was still primarily a word-of-mouth affair, orders placed on Facebook, very homegrown. Lessem, Losoya, and their dedicated juicing cohort Jackie Heilner squeezed veggies and fruit into hundreds and hundreds of mason jars. With a financial boost from business partners Mike and Shawn Indrigo, Squeeze Juice was able to move into its current storefront at 675 30th Ave. N. in October, officially opening with a celebration at the end of November.

After Bay News 9 visited the shop, business soared. “We were just barely keeping up with demand until the Bay News 9 story,” Losoya tells me as she pours bottles of Galaxie 500 (beet, apple, cucumber, spinach and lemon). “We can’t make it fast enough.”

Weekdays, Lessum and Losoya and the crew arrive between 5 and 6 a.m. “On Sundays, sometimes we sleep in until 7,” Losoya says, laughing. They often stay until 11 p.m. juicing or doing consultations with customers. Rollin’ Oats regulars in St. Petersburg will see a familiar face at Squeeze in KC Cavanaugh, who just started as one of the main members of Lessem’s juice crew.

Customers walking through the door in search of juice represent a cross-section of the population — age, gender, race, economic status. “Each 16-ounce bottle contains about four to six pounds of raw organic produce,” Lessem explains to a couple who walked in curious but unfamiliar with Squeeze. “The enzymes stay alive up to 20 days.” The middle-aged couple say they want something for “this moment, to get started and get the idea.” They walk out with a bottle of Getting Fresh (pineapple, cucumber, mint and lemon).

Newbies usually purchase a single bottle, but seasoned Squeeze Juicers walk out with armfuls. A regular named David who works down the road from Squeeze stops by to pick up some juice for himself and his coworkers. At $8.99, sticker shock can set in until folks get more familiar with the benefits and process. Now, Squeeze offers “lil chuggers”— 8-ounce juices — for $4.99.

“We’ve calculated the average amount we’re spending on juice this year is $8,490,” David says, laughing, as Lessem hands over two carriers filled with bottles. “It’s definitely worth it.”

Tiffany Marie, who’s been coming to Lessem since the co-op days, just had a baby four days ago. While still in the hospital, she sent her husband out to get Squeeze Juice.

“Don’t be surprised if some nurses come by soon,” she tells Lessem.

Cleanses are a big part of Squeeze Juice Works’ customer base, with one, three, five, and 10-day cleanses available. Orders must be placed in advance and longer cleanses require multiple pickups. Today, there are seven three-day cleanses to produce. As New Year’s approaches, that number will grow.

Again, more bottles are filled, capped, and placed on the counter for Lessem to label before being placed in the cooler. This time it’s the bright orange special, Child’s Play, or as Lessem refers to it, “liquid sunshine in a jar.”

On this particular Thursday, Squeeze has one of its busiest days yet, bottling and selling over 300 juices. That’s why Squeeze is looking forward to the arrival of a X-1 commercial hydraulic cold-juice press. “Today I had to say no [to a customer] because the juices were already promised. I hate that,” Lessum says. “The X-1 can do what takes us four hours to now, in just an hour.”

Lessem has begun doing consultations for cancer patients, and currently has about four patients who drink 5-6 juices a day — about 32 juices a week, through a specific protocol called the Gerson Method.

“It gets the body to wake up, gets the digestion to wake up,” Lessem says. “They have to be willing to surrender to the process and be completely committed, then it works famously.”

But what she really wants is to get juice into everyone’s hands. She references the ubiquity of Coca-Cola. “I want to replace every can with our juice.” And what she means is that she doesn’t want cold-pressed juice to find its way only to “hippies and the wealthy.” What Lessem wants and what Squeeze Juice Works hopes to accomplish is to get everyone on the juice.

“People come into Squeeze and really identify as being broken. I lived that once,” Lessem says. “But the process of healing should be a place where you can really shine. We are giving you the vehicle to do that with our juice. I’m just asking you to develop a personal care system that is right for you. Once you do that, the body will lead you toward healing.”

Squeeze Juice Works, 675 30th Ave. N., Suite 101, St. Petersburg, 727-821-1095, squeezejuiceworks.com.

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